Ok people, this is an open, unabashed call for advice -- whether I know you or not! Our Ian is 3 1/2. He has PDD (otherwise known as a Touch O' the Autism), and is language delayed. And he LOVES his Binkie. I mean, LOVES it. He calls out for it forlornly -- "BBIIINNKIIIEEEEE!!!" when he doesn't have it. We've pretty much established that Binkies are for sleeping times, but at night -- oh my. His therapists and speech pathologists (and dentist) all claim that The Binkie is Satan himself, and his language will be SO much better once he lets go of it. Now, I'm not convinced that Binkie is the entire problem, but it is time to let go of it. Bear in mind that Ian doesn't communicate very well, and we're not exactly sure of how much of our short explanations register with him. But he is a smart little boy (read: manipulative and sneaky), so I know he understands a lot. Here's what we've tried:
1. Cold turkey. This kid has some staying power. He cried for over an hour when I tried it and I gave in. My mommy heart just couldn't take it.
2. Cutting the tips off Binkie. This didn't work about a year ago -- he just turned it on its side and inserted the entire thing into his pie hole. So, when faced with the decision: Binkie vs. choking hazard, I chose Binkie.
3. Revisiting cutting the tips off Binkie. We've been doing this for 3 days now. He's incredibly pissed off. He's consumed with it. Now, the flip side is, with Binkie in its current, amputated state, he can no longer stick his tongue out when it's in his mouth (therapists say "tongue thrust" is a big issue) -- he has to close his lips or teeth around it to hold it in. But man oh man, is he angry about it! He's started screaming at bedtime, when up until now (well, since he "learned" to go to sleep well) he's RUN to bed happy as can be. The screaming goes on and on until Mommy goes in and snuggles him, which believe me, I love. But I also realize that's not a great habit to get into. And then there's the waking at 4:30am, again pissed off beyond belief, followed by a visit from me, followed by awake for good at 5:30am. Ick.
So, advice??? I'm not in favor of putting nasty tasting stuff on Binkie (as suggested by Zorka as the preferred method in her country) -- that's just mean, right? He's not conversational enough to "give" Binkie to some unnamed baby who "needs" it more than he does, and he doesn't understand the quid pro quo involved in bribery/extortion. So, do I just stick to my current guns? Do I gradually cut more and more off of Binkie until it's just a nub? Is there a better way?? Help, please. Ian and I need an intervention!
I think you should go cold turkey. I know it would be tough to do, but if it's something that needs to be done then unfortunately you have to do it. Here is where the parent in me comes out: "Unfortunately we are the one's that have to make this decision. We are the grown-ups." :) I'd imagine that he won't be happy with it for a few days, but he'll fall asleep and soon realize that he doesn't need it any longer.
ReplyDeleteNow that I gave you my advice... are you really going to listen to someone who has never had kids!!! :) I'm sure in a few months I'll be asking for some advice as well.
Matt
"Clay in His Hands" blogger here. I am reading all IAN blogs and just had to give my two cents. All three of my little ones had binkies. And the truth is...I agree with Matt, it's cold turkey time!!! Just know you will have a very bad 24-48 hrs, but then you will be DONE. If he asks where it is, "binkie is all gone, sorry." I would recommend lots of loving and extra attention to take his mind off of it. You can do it!
ReplyDeleteSorry no advice.....Gabre still takes a bottle at nap and night time!
ReplyDelete~Leah